His story/His story: “My wife won’t let me hang out with my friends”

His story: My wife is a very possessive women. We now have two children, one of whom is a teenager. She wasn’t always like that, but since I got a promotion, she’s become suffocatingly possessive. She doesn’t even let me make plans with my colleagues or friends. My gang also includes women and we have known each other since childhood. My wife yells at me and gets hysterical when I tell her about my plans. His behavior is very confusing and humiliating. I don’t understand what’s going on here because on the confrontation she has no reasoning.
His story: My husband is a handsome man in fact he seems to be aging backwards. Since he was promoted, his friends have become more sensitive and affectionate with him. And I’m talking about his childhood friends. One of them had the nerve to tell me that I should be wary of all the female attention he gets! I don’t like these women and I think if I tell my husband all this, he will be offended. Is there another way to make him understand?
Expert advice by Vishal BhardwajFounder of Predictions For Success:
His history
It is normal to be possessive in a marriage, but when you overdo it, it becomes very difficult for the spouse and quite stressful in the relationship. As you mentioned, your wife is a very possessive woman. And ever since you got promoted, she’s become more possessive. She doesn’t let you make plans with your friends and even yells at you. I can understand your situation. You must feel smothered and under control. First you need to realize that his possessiveness may be a result of his deep love for you, his fear of losing you, and his low self-esteem. The best way to deal with a possessive partner is to have a thorough conversation with them about the situation. In this way, you could determine precisely what is going on in his mind.
You will be able to learn more about the worries or insecurities that make her feel uncomfortable and cause her to act possessively. Also, while talking to her, let her know how you feel about the big picture. Tell him honestly how hurt you are by his actions and how bad you feel. Besides talking, there are a few other things you should do to ease his worried mind. Try to earn back her trust and express your deep love for her.
Also, make sure you don’t comment on another woman. Whenever she screams or creates a scene, you need to keep calm and not retaliate. And once she has calmed down, you can talk about it quietly. Making plans with your friends is fine, but you should also make plans with your wife to prevent her from feeling ignored. Above are some suggestions for dealing with this situation. As an alternative, you can consult a professional advisor. A counselor will hear stories from both parties and provide an honest place to talk so you can come to the best possible resolution.
His history
In a marriage, care and affection are important. However, there is a fine line between love and possessiveness. Everyone in a relationship needs to watch to make sure they don’t get too possessive. As you mentioned, your husband is a handsome man and he is close to his girlfriends. And you don’t like him considering going out with his friends.
It is very obvious that you are not comfortable with this whole situation and have developed a lot of insecurities. The first thing you need to understand is that communication is the key to a happy marriage. Never be afraid or shy to talk about things with your husband. You think that if you tell your husband that you don’t like his girlfriends, he will be offended. So instead of talking things out, you started showing your insecurities the other way around. But you need to understand that this will only aggravate the situation and negatively affect your relationship. Find an appropriate time and situation to talk with your husband. Clearly express your feelings to him. Also, ask him to maintain transparency in the marriage so that you can trust him more. Other than that, you need to work on your self-esteem and confidence.
Start working on yourself; engage in confidence-boosting activities. Maintain a productive and healthy routine, participate in extra social activities, and plan to see your friends. You can also ask your husband to invite his friends to your house for a meeting. It’s a way you can all interact with each other and it reduces the risk of insecurity. Seek professional help if you still feel stuck or confused. A professional will help you both understand each other’s point of view and get out of this problem happily.
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